I'll win our war
by MedusaOfTheSpecies
Summary: Do not go gentle into that good night but rage, rage against the dying of the light :: Parvati Patil and life after the war :: For QLFC Round 4


**QLFC, Round 4: Forgotten Families. Chaser 3 for the Arrows.**

 _Prompt's: (The Patil family) Parvati Patil and Padma Patil, (animal) cat, (word) print, (phobia) Heliophobia – fear of sunlight._

 **Ultimate Writer Challenge:** _angsty OTP fic (ParvatiLavender)_

 **Friends Challenge:** _TOW Russ (write about twins)_

 **x.X.x**

Parvati wakes up to the dull hum of machines and the bitter smell of healing potions. Her hospital gown is too big on her, hiding away the sharp edges of her bones. She's lost weight- lots of it- these past few months. The Carrows were not below starving those who opposed them, and she couldn't keep her mouth shut to save her life.

Padma is in the bed closest to her, sprawled out with her hair hanging over the sides of her bed. There is so much innocence in how peaceful Padma looks, and it takes her breath away, leaving Parvati gasping for air.

The healers come and go, fussing over the dark circles under her eyes and citing magical exhaustion as the reason for the numbness in her body. It's suiting, the word exhaustion, with the silent condolences left unsaid by those who say the word. She is _exhausted,_ tired of pity and hatred and war.

She's only seventeen and she's broken, numb, dull, done. She's finished with the war _(and all the lives it took)_ and with prejudice _(mudblood and pureblood and don't they know it's all the same when it's spilled?)_

Her healer's name is Healer Stanford, and he looks at her like she's a child. She doesn't hex him, but that's only because it's a hospital and not a war zone.

 _(Or is it really? Hogwarts was only a school but that didn't stop the curses for killing so many innocents. Lavender was only a child but her dead body laid on the table she used to eat at.)_

Healer Stanford says, in what should be a calming tone, "You must stay at least another week, Ms. Patil."

Parvati runs a finger across her scars and smiles at the way it makes him flinch.

 **x.X.x**

They're gone as soon as Padma's ready. Later, an owl will come from her mother's secretary, explaining how Mr. and Mrs. Patil are terribly busy in meetings but should be there in about a week.

When the war came, their parents ran to France. Padma went to the blue and bronze tower and carefully crafted lists of things she would rather do than join the Carrows in her neat print. Padma left them hanging: in the walls of the astronomy classroom, on a statue in the dungeons, and hanging right on the door of the Headmaster's office. When Snape saw it, he dragged in every crimson and gold student he could get his hands on. Padma walked right past him and didn't get a second look.

Parvati went to the brash crimson of the Gryffindor common room and laughed when the Carrows threatened her. She would not be broken by anything, let alone two cowards who let other students Crucio her instead of doing it themselves.

 **x.X.x**

 _Courage. Chivalry. Determination._

This is what her house is known for, the lions so often nicknamed reckless and foolish and brass.

It takes courage to stand up to your fears. When Parvati was thirteen, her biggest fear was a mummy she saw in a museum, the fear of being buried alive chilling her to the core. When she was seventeen, Parvati's biggest fear was burying her family: her sister Padma, her beloved girlfriend Lav, kind and warm Dean, loud and opinionated Seamus, brave and gentle Neville, confident Ginny, and all the other students who she laughed and studied with during these seven years.

She buries the only girl she ever loved on a cold and windy day, surrounded by pity neither of them would have wanted. Lavender hates _(hated, now)_ winter, all the colds and runny noses and freezing down to her bones. On the bad days _(or maybe they're the good ones?),_ she can almost hear Lavender complaining about how the wind is messing up her hair.

 **x.X.x**

The apartment Padma and she move into has dull white walls, with three bedrooms, a kitchen, and a living room.

Padma begins decorating with an enthusiasm that scares Parvati more than any Death Eater ever could. Her sister throws herself into making the apartment look festive, and all she can think about is Padma hiding in their manor's library because their mother announced that she wanted to go shopping for the household.

She leaves her room bare, not wanting any more reminders of the past. The haunted eyes she sees in the mirror are enough.

 **x.X.x**

In late August, she receives the owl that she's been dreading. It's a DA-wide offer, the chance to join the prestigious Auror department. She takes the letter and hides it under a box. The Ministry can drone on about bravery, about how it's the DA's duty to help rid the world of evil, all they want.

 _(Haven't they done enough?)_

 **x.X.x**

 _What's the definition of bravery? What truly makes a person brave?_

Is it the way Ginny scales the world on her broom, daring anyone to doubt her? Ginny's the seventh child of a dirt-poor pureblood house. Ginny is a child, still only a 7th year. Ginny has been a war veteran for longer than any of them. Parvati doesn't know the whole story, might never know it, but she remembers the faded girl after the chamber who grew up to lead an army.

Some days, Parvati thinks it might be the way Padma pours her soul into ink and word, daring the world to forget how much they sacrificed. Padma lost her smooth skin to scars, her naivety to war's harsh realities. These days, the only scars Padma will get will be the papercuts and permanent ink stains from writing with her left hand.

Maybe it's Hermione, the girl who had mudblood hissed at her from the age of eleven, who studied hard and tried even harder. Maybe, somewhere, someday, the world will repay the childhood it stole from Hermione. But these days, Parvati catches glimpses of Hermione's tired face, the bags under her eyes from sleepless nights, the way determination lights up her face. Deep down, Parvati knows the day the world repays Hermione Granger will not come soon.

 **x.X.x**

She's almost forgotten that she wasn't the only one who loved Lavender Brown. It's only when it's Lav's birthday and the DA knocks on her door that Parvati realizes how closed off she's been this past year.

They're all here: Harry, who died and then lived for them; Ron, who broke Lav's heart in his own selfishness; Hannah Abbott, whose hair she and Lavender teamed up to do for the Yule Ball.

Hermione's there too. Their roommate, who mocked them for six years and then tried to save Lavender's life from an absolute monster. Hermione failed, and Parvati notes bitterly that Hermione has never failed at anything else.

Parvati feels the tears begin to spill and flees the room. Padma, noticing, makes her quick apologies to the boy she was talking to and runs after her.

It's like a movie scene, the Muggle ones she saw in summers spend in Lavender's neighborhood. The heartbroken girl, throwing her life away. The tears come harder now.

Padma approaches softly and wraps one arm around Parvati's shoulders. "It's hard to watch you fall apart," Padma says quietly.

"It's even harder to live without her," Parvati snaps back.

Padma doesn't even flinch.

"I know." She says simply, and they fall into silence until the door creaks and their gazes shoot up, wands at the ready.

It's no Death Eater though, no one but Hermione Granger clutching a package so big it dwarfs her.

"I'm so sorry, Parvati. I wish I could have saved her," Hermione begins and Parvati opens her mouth to interrupt, only to be pulled back by Padma. "I know this isn't enough but well, you two always loved Crookshanks and I remember you wanted a cat so…"

Hermione trails off, place the package on the floor with gentle ease and Parvati blinks furiously to stop the on-shed of tears when a little kitten crawls out. It's beautiful, a snow-white coat and grey eyes that open sleepily upon seeing the new area.

"Thank you, Hermione," Parvati breathes, falling to her knees to take the cat into her hands. "Thank _you."_

"No, thank you," Hermione whispers, tears falling down her cheeks. "Thank you for forgiving me."

 **x.X.x**

"Our dead aren't better than us, Pav," Padma says in between cutting carrots. Parvati tosses them into the soup on autopilot.

"I know that," Parvati says flatly, tossing a carrot at her sister.

Padma hums noncommittally and turns to face her sister, catching the carrot and throwing it back into the soup. "Pav, you can't go on like this."

"Like what?" Parvati challenges and Padma's face falls.

"Pav, you haven't been out of the flat in ages. All you do is play with your kitten and cry. I think you may have Heliophobia at this rate. Let me help you, please," Padma says compassionately, leaning in to hug her sister.

Parvati pushes her sister off violently. "Get off of me. I don't have whatever phobia you just said and I'm perfectly fine."

Padma doesn't say anything, just raises her eyebrow and waits. One second goes by, then two, until half a minute has passed, and Parvati can't take it anymore.

"Fine. You were right," Parvati says. "But what do you expect me to do?"

Padma leans over and wraps her arms around her shorter twin, who leans her head on her shoulder. "Get a job, Pav. Go outside. Start living for yourself again."

Parvati nods, choking on her words as she speaks, "Okay. Okay, I will."

Padma hugs her sister closer and they stay like that, huddled in as if drawing from each other's strength.

 **x.X.x**

" ," The Head Hit Witch says, pushing her glasses up tiredly, "I'm going to be very frank with you. At this moment, you are a war heroine with the whole world on your side. Any job you want is yours, so why on earth would you choose the most dangerous one of them all?"

Parvati stares back blankly. "Why wouldn't I want to become a Hit Witch?"

The look on the Hit Witch's face could've killed, had Parvati not been so accustomed to people second-guessing her life choices. " , the Hit Wizard and Witches are not the Auror department. There are no dark wizards or glory to be found here. The Hit Department deals with things like child abuse and robbery long before we deal with dark magic, and in all honesty, we don't hire fresh graduates because they don't get that. They want to be heroes."

Parvati leans forward, her hair falling into her face, and she pushes it back impatiently. "I already got to be a hero and it wasn't worth it to see people bleed for a minute of glory and a badge. I want to save people and that includes everyone; even the people the world doesn't think should be saved."

The Hit Witch locks eyes with Parvati as if she's looking for something. Parvati stares right back, raising an eyebrow until the Hit Witch leans back, satisfied.

She stands up and pushes a batch of paperwork towards Parvati. "Congratulations, Hit Witch Patil. Fill it all out by Wednesday and be here Thursday at nine."

"Thank you," Parvati breathes, grabbing the papers and scooping them to her chest. "You won't regret it."

"I already do," the Hit Witch says, but her smile has softened and Parvati grins back.

 **x.X.x**

"I got the job," Parvati says over dinner, almost inhaling steaming soup.

Padma looks up over the pile of pages she's writing over and beams. "I'm proud of you, Pav. I'm glad you're getting it together."

"Yeah," is all Parvati says, but she's smiling. For a minute, the feeling of satisfaction she hasn't felt since before the war surrounds her like a warm blanket. "I guess I am."

 **x.X.x**

"It's your turn to get it," Dean Thomas informs his boyfriend as the doorbell rings. Seamus Finnigan gives an exaggerated sigh but stands up anyways, wrapping the blanket around him as he shuffles towards the door.

Seamus flings the door open and promptly lets out a gasp as he sees the person standing on the other side. Dean, upon hearing his reaction, runs to the door and pales.

Parvati smiles sheepishly from where she and Padma stand on the doorstep. "Hi… sorry, I didn't tell you guys we were coming by, but we brought cookies."

"Oh, no problem, Pav," Dean says, opening the door further so they can step in. Seamus points the two girls towards the living room and exchanges confused looks with Dean. They haven't really spoken to Parvati since Lavender died, and today's visit is a shock to say the least.

But, at least she's here. It's late but Parvati is here, surrounded by her sister and friends, the way Lavender would have wanted.

"Ladies," Seamus says, grabbing both of their hands. "Have you seen our new kitchen?"

 **x.X.x**

 _Dear Lav,_

 _I'm sorry it's taken this long to write. I know you loved letters and I tried so many times, but writing is nothing when you're not there to answer me. I'm sorry it's taken so long for a lot of things. I wish you were here, with me. I miss you so badly I can't do anything but cry some days._

 _It took me a long time to put myself back together after you died. I'm not over you and I doubt I'll ever be, but I'm trying to live. The bad days tear me apart, but I'm trying so hard now, Lav._

 _I'm a Hit Witch now. It's far from the glorious jobs we wanted, and it's taking so long for people to have faith in me, but I think you'd approve. I'm saving the world, one step at a time. You would have done the same thing, I think. Maybe not in the same way, but you would have helped people too._

 _It's all because of Padma. You once jokingly told me that my sister was a goddess, and you were right. She's saving me. She helped me get a job and she does my nails for me the way you used too. It's always Lavender coloured, I promise. We go see Dean and Seamus a lot, did you know they're married now? I wanted to marry you, but now I just want you to have been proud of me._

 _I love you, Lav. I always will. You taught me everything I know, and you helped me when no one else would have taken that chance on me. You taught me to stop hating being in Padma's shadow and how to love her when I was so angry and jealous._

 _I miss you, and I'll always love you,_

 _Parvati Pati_

 **x.X.x**

 ** _Last conversation between Padma Patil and Lavender Brown, May 2nd/1998, 7pm._**

"We'll take care of Parvati, right? Whichever of us makes it out alive."

"Of course we will."


End file.
